What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more! And blah blah

I had a chat with a dear friend of mine today, and I'm glad he got some closure to the situation, but this will allow him to move on. Probably he doesn't know, but all his friends were worried about him. No friend wants to see another friend going through a rough time.
During this conversation we had a chat over quality versus quantity which is also mentioned on Steve's blog.
There are some fundamental things regarding "romantic" life that I dissagree with him. We both know this. Maybe some tension there, and I hope he doesn't take my difference at heart, I respect his difference in opinion.
He is on the quality side, and maybe he prefer the "finer" things in life, but how can you measure quality? There are so many variables or perceived notion of quality. Sure, on a service or product you can basically say quality is based on its abilty to perform well on what it was design for. But can you tell what people were designed for? Probably not, as legions of people are still trying to figure out what to do with their life.
The first definition of quality from a dictionary is; " An inherent or distinguishing characteristic; a property". Let say someone artistical, would see the "distinguishing" characteristic of a work of art as the technique used for the painting, while the agent would see the auction value as the "distinguishing" characteristic.

I remember talking to Dana once, where she said said "Some people set their standards too high." That would be a threshold scale of a perceived quality which varies from person to person. If you set the standard too high, a lot of things will fail to meet up with the quality level you set for thus will cause a decline in quantity. Possibly, nothing will meet the set quality level for a long while. So is it so bad to lower quality standards to generate a little increase in volume? I can understand wanting the quality aspect, but if it's not generating any volume whatsoever, then?

Currently my standards perceived as low by some, and I agree to some extent, I'm not too happy with it, but I'm flesh and bone. My current situation does not permit me to socialize with "quality" girls. At work, there are almost no females whatsoever, and the few are just not my type. Then where to? Clubs? Well weekend are based on bars and clubs which I admit is not the best place to find "quality" girls, but I'm not going to fervently dismiss the whole scene based on an hyphotetical notion that these places harbors only sluts and jerks. Although due to the mind set of of most people that goes there, at least temporarily, the place is more of a meat market then anything. But are club goes and bar hoppers truly the bottom of the "quality" level? I hardly think so. They are people like the rest of us, I believe my friends are quality people and most of them do often go to these same places, myself included. Which my friend bought an excellent question. When was the last time you found a quality girl in a club/bar? I would say a long ass time ago, but do I ever follow up with the girls days after? No. Maybe if I had followed up with calls they could have ended up being interesting or of a good "quality" type. But think it as this way, I hardly remember any girls face, I can't make shit of number with a face, why? Because I was drunk? This means I wasn't being a "quality" person myself the time I met the girl? I got numbers on my cellphone and napkins which I don't remember who they are, mostly importantly, I don't even remember what I even talked to them. Probably just some gibberish to be able to make out. Like I said, I'm a son of god too, while I wait for "the one" I need some "lovin" in the meantime. I know some people will say that is crap, but well if you are fine with chastity, then more power to you, but I do need some kind of female interaction in the meantime, regardless of how abhorrent it may sound. Bottom line, I'm not going to waste my life, empty handed for the arrival of "the one", my "princess". Most likely this person will never arrived, because relationship are complex social ritual where people have to be willing to accept differences and put effort to make it work, amongst other things. The oh so perfect one will not land on my lap. During the initial infatuation or lust of a relationship, she may sound perfect, but is it really? Why are there break up and divorces? I'm sure they all started with the misplaced notion that love/the perfect one is all you need. No, what happened was that something was lacking, be it inabilty to reconcile differnces, be it the initial "flame" is no longer there, etc... I truly believe that there is no such thing as love at first sight, so there will never be the one of the perfect one. Love is something you develop during the relationship, not before. What people consider love at first sight, I consider lust. But I blame a lot of the these preconceived notions on books, specially the classic romantics. Most of them shows the suffering of people going greath lenghts and then, they get nothing, or kills themselves in the name of love. What kind of crap is that? Why do they keep romanticizing this kind of self flagelation as love? What good is in torturing people with some "ideals and "values" which cause great suffering? Do people still believe in this? I thought these days, at least based on repeated personal experiences, people would know this is just a "romantic" story, to put children asleep.

Anyways back to the topic about not meeting "quality" girls. It's not like I have much choice these days, its not like back in college, where there are a bunch of "quality" girls to meet. And please, college was not necessarily a great place either. I remember some psycho girls from there, and Dana will probably agree with this way I say, I met a devil's bitch there. It's all about luck, although certain places will increase the odds. So I was suggested gym, which doesn't pan out when I'm the only one ever using the gym in my building. Then he suggested activities, which I agree, but what other activities? Sure attending classes will help, but I'm not in any class right now. And I will definitely not pay for a class just for the socializing aspect of it, I rather actually take a class to learn of something I'm interested, if the money allows me to. Most likely I rather devote to whatever I'm learning, rather then trying to socialize with the girls. We all know how it went for me when I was more interested in socializing then actually paying attention to classes.

So at least, right now, I'm in a limbo type of situation, and I'm flesh and bones, that needs female interaction. So bar and clubs is filling this gap for me at the moment. I don't find the act of "chasing girls" retarded, rather a need for some self fullfillment for the time being.

Though one thing I agree with a couple of friends I talked about, we are scattering too much when we hit the clubs. We make an entry together at the venue, and after a couple of drinks, we basically scatter "chasing girls". I understand not all my friends are fan of the chasing girls thing. And we should definitely spend more time ourselves. I feel that lately, the scattering thing to chase girls, basically put a void in between friends. Not saying we shouldn't chase girls from now on, because some do enjoy chasing girls, but try to balance it out, and actually spend more time with friend.

Fuck, that was long.

Behave kids.